Studies show that men have a major impact and influence on a woman’s final decision about her pregnancy.* Men are either aware of the pregnancy and must respond in some way, or they are left out of the decision because they never knew about their child.
Some men respond by taking responsibility and stepping up in leadership. These men usually have a strong desire to provide for and protect the mother and child. Others pressure or threaten the mother to abort their child.
Another role that many men choose is a passive one. Zach McClellan is an actor in a short film about crisis pregnancy, A Faucet Drips. In an interview (listen to it in the podcast below), Zach admits that this silent and unsupportive role is one that many young men today easily slip into when faced with a pregnant girlfriend.
Society and feminism say it is the woman’s right – her body – her choice. Where does he fit in that picture? “Who am I to speak?”, he may ask himself. He refuses to voice his opinion or participate in the decision. “It’s your choice,” he tells her.
This passive and neutral position that feels like a kind and giving response to his girlfriend, can actually be setting the foundation for her heartache and despair that often follow the abortion.
If you are a man who has played a role in the abortion of your child, be it an active or passive role, you do have a right to grieve. You do have a right to recognize that child as yours. You are a father. The regret and loss can manifest into negative emotions and behaviors in the years that follow the abortion. Anger and grief are roadblocks to coping when reality sets in.
Hearts Restored, a ministry of Clarity, provides one-on-one counseling for men who have experiences abortion; no matter what role they played. There is no judgment; only compassion shown by someone who cares and has been where you are. Contact Don today by email.
Podcast with Zach McClellan on Kim Ketola’s Cradle My Heart radio show: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/when-abortion-hits-millennial-men/id1166251879?i=1000386441208&mt=2