Have you ever thought something would be a good idea, but eventually it turned out to harm you? That huge chocolate sundae sounded so good, but after you eat it all, you feel sick and your belly hurts. How about staying up late to binge watch your favorite show on Netflix. Sounds fun, right? But after a late night, you wake up tired the next day and can’t get motivated to do what’s on your schedule.
Here’s the point. Some things in life can be enticing and even seem harmless to us. But the reality is—that’s just not the case. Pornography is one such thing. Studies show it is addictive and the effects of it can be damaging to our brains, relationships, and our behaviors. It’s not a harmless pastime as many think.
Here are three reasons why you should consider saying no to porn.
- It teaches the brain that sex is all about you.
Talk about affecting relationships. Sex is not a spectator sport, but porn sure can be. Viewed alone it trains the brain that sex is about the person viewing. Many times masturbation is involved. A healthy sexual relationship is between two committed people in marriage. One where an individual is concerned with the other persons’ needs and pleasure, not about the pleasure they can get for themselves.
- It trains the brain that one person will never satisfy.
Pornography encourages the multiplicity of partners. What watching porn does is reminds a person of all of the potential sexual partners there are out there, which lowers the dedication a person has to the person they are involved with. It can also encourage a person to fantasize about someone they are not in bed with, and probably never will be. There have been studies done on porn consumption in relationships, and it was found that porn consumption lowered commitment in both men and women, but more so in men. (See Pyschology Today)
- It sets a future spouse up for failure.
A person who has viewed porn may have preconceived notions about what sex should be like. If a spouse does not meet these expectations, problems could occur with their intimacy. A healthy, intimate sexual relationship should be exclusive between two people and about experiencing and discovering things with each other.
How do you protect yourself from pornography’s negative effects when it seems to be readily available everywhere? Take away the temptations as much as possible. Don’t use your computer in your room alone with your door shut. It’s too tempting. Don’t keep your smart phone in your room with you all night. It’s too tempting. When someone presents inappropriate material to you, say no thanks, I’m not into that. Guard the purity of your mind. You’re worth it, your health is worth it, and your relationships are worth it.
Thanks for your advice.God bless u
Thanks for the advice
But I’m addicted to Porn I want to quit. Pls help me
Thank you for reaching out. First of all you need to know that you are not alone! MANY people are struggling with the very same issue you are.
We want you to know how important it is that you recognize and/or suspect that you have a problem with pornography, as this is a huge step in the right direction of freeing yourself from a very damaging habit.
Recognizing the problem is the first step, then making/taking correct steps in a healthy direction is the next. Consider setting limits for yourself and monitoring your access to damaging materials. Accountability is very important for all of us – consider asking a trusted adult/friend to help you with those limits/monitoring.
In the meantime, there are couple of things you can do on your own.
1) Take all technology out of your bedroom and put it in public places/spaces (if technology is the source of the pornography).
2) Find a peer group/public service project /hobby to keep yourself busy with little down-time to surf the Internet, use technology, etc.
These are healthy habits to develop for anyone! In the meantime, you may also consider searching the Internet for programs that address porn addiction by typing “porn addiction help” in your web-search browser. There is a lot of help to be had! Here are a few sites that we recommend checking out:
feedtherightwolf.org
x3pure.com
If you are a person of faith and would like to check out a faith-based resource, you could also look at: xxxchurch.com
So, now you know what to do, the first step will be the hardest; get technology out of your possession and go have a conversation with a trusted friend/adult. Freedom is one step closer with every good/healthy decision you make!
You can do this! You have already proven your incredible wisdom, your great depth of understanding how unhealthy the habit is, and amazing willingness to take back your life and re-claim the purity of your mind!